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Jan 5, 2008

Glossary of UMNO/BN terms


  • "Accountability" only applies to publicly exposed sexual indiscretion and not financial scandal or abuse of power
  • "Anti-corruption" means only the small fish, or those who are no longer favoured by the PM, are investigated and prosecuted
  • "Clean" means turning a blind eye on all evidence of graft or abuse of power, and usually follows "We will look into it", and is applicable only to top tier government politicians
  • "Cost effectiveness" only applies to the private sector, and certain unfavoured public sector
  • "Democracy" means majority mob rules, without regard for rule of law, respect for fundamental rights enshrined in the Constitution, or public consultation
  • "Free and fair elections" means strictly free for the ruling coalition to abuse state apparatus during campaign period, breaching Electoral Laws by promising projects as bribes, monopolising the media and denegrading the opposition, benefiting from ages of gerrymandering, and having a compliant Election Commission
  • "Freedom of assembly" is only for supporters of the ruling coalition - any opposition rally is deemed a threat to National Security (see below)
  • "Freedom of religion" is only meant for adults and not children, and is only for non-Malays (so who says only the non-Bumis are discriminated against)
  • "I will listen" means listening only to self-serving kaki bodeks and not the civil society and public at large
  • "Independence of the Judiciary" means freedom from all other political forces, except UMNO/BN
  • "Inflation" means a small selection of grocery items, instead a basket that's more representative of current day reality including fuel and basic transportation and housing needs
  • "Islamic state" which by definition means a theocratic state, still means a state run by a secular constitution, but the Islamic authorities including syariah courts get to encroach into the space of civil law in spite of the original social contract
  • "Malay rights" means the right of UMNO to taxpayers' money through award of contracts without open tender
  • "Malaysia boleh" means UMNO/BN can essentially do anything they want and get away with it, except maybe when near elections
  • "National security" means the political security of UMNO/BN, and not the nation as a whole
  • "NEP still required" means UMNO/BN is not done milking the coffers, and it's good to have poverty ridden Malays to justify continuation of the policy
  • "Politicking" is a naughty word, usually only applies to opposition criticism of the government, side-stepping the issue being criticised about
  • "Press freedom" is when the press gets to report half-truths in favour of the ruling coalition
  • "Progress" is when you send millions sending a space tourist to space with no discernible leap in technological innovation for the nation, except damaged experiments and pretty pictures, and a promise to do the same thing again in the near future
  • "Public consultation" means rushing a bill past Members of Parliament with little time for debate
  • "Sedition" means instilling hatred in the ruling coalition as a political entity, instead of the universal meaning of instilling hatred against the government structure of the nation itself, such as when the Communists sought to bring down the Tzars in Russia, or the republic, in China
  • "Service with a smile" means smiling at you while saying "sorry we only take in this number of applications today, please travel tens of km back again tomorrow", "your application to hold a peaceful assembly is rejected", "the officer has gone to attend "kursus"", "sorry we couldn't save him because ambulance ran out of petrol"
  • "Transparency" applies only to the private sector, opposition parties, and non-favoured public authorities; not UMNO/BN
  • "We are fair" means the ruling coalition treats transgressions of law, within itself, with kid's gloves, and everyone else gets the full brunt of the law, i.e. selective prosecution
  • "We will look into it" in the context of opposition complaints means the file is marked "No further action required"
  • "Work with me", that is, until we have completely plundered the economy, provide for another 10 generations of our children and grandchildren, and comfortably retire in another paradise island, leaving the rest behind high and dry


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